tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-66540112024-02-28T10:08:01.650-05:00What's A Year In ForeverJohnny5's stories, observations, and intelligent babble.Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.comBlogger90125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1111498381482191942005-03-22T10:00:00.000-05:002005-03-22T10:43:43.563-05:00TruancyWhen I was in high school, leaving the grounds during our "free periods" wasn't allowed except in cases of permission acquired from the dean. This was usually facilitated by a note from the 'rents or a doctor's appointment, a special exemption from the dean, or being sent home by the school nurse. In no way, during our independent rebellions, were those the only viable reasons to leave grounds. Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1111068060821474892005-03-17T08:50:00.000-05:002005-03-18T20:00:57.880-05:00Reconstruction ...[I] am a huge fan of being a swanky simpleton in whatever way I can. Well, as you can see, I've made a number of changes in design and some in delivery. Part of this is an attempt at reforming my blog-o-sphere personality. I feel as if somehow, I'm struggling for an audience.Part of it, however, is that the old template always seemed to load slow. In my testing of Firefox and Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1110663314184838932005-03-12T16:32:00.000-05:002005-03-18T21:37:29.386-05:00Whose Line Is It?This is a direct rip from Celti's linkage. Richard Simmons on Whose Line Is It Anyway?. I watched it twice, and now my eyes are well hydrated and sinuses all clear from nearly laughing my face completely off of my head.Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1110239257779478692005-03-07T18:46:00.000-05:002005-03-07T18:49:15.503-05:00Tests Based On TechI find it funny that people take online tests.Don’t get me wrong, I take them all the time myself. But it’s interesting that we grow up abhorring and fearing tests, and as adults, we find comfort and solace in them. I often wonder, somewhere in the back of my mind, and secretly hope, I think, that the result will allow me some sort of epiphany about… myself.We all seek answers to some of the mostJohnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1109694437591080442005-03-01T11:50:00.000-05:002005-03-18T20:40:45.206-05:00ShortsParty PeopleI want to thank Kat, Zelda, Jethro, Catt, Laura, and Celti for being such faithful readers and commenters. I really appreciate having you all around. You've kept me around in blogland.TrackbackHas anyone actually ever used the trackback part of Haloscan? I've used it all of three times, I believe, but it's funny that no one often has the urge to implement that little tool.Calling Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1109613600804273362005-02-28T12:53:00.000-05:002005-02-28T13:00:06.866-05:00Pepsi - I'm a Hustler BabyHave you seen the iTunes Pepsi commercial? Most of it is just whatever and geeky, but the white guy busting out to Jay-Z's "I Just Wanna Love You (Give It To Me)" makes me laugh out loud every time I've seen it. I even went so far as to find the Pepsi Commerical Online.Note: It's about 1.8 MB and you need Quicktime."I'm a hustla baby... I just want you to know..."Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1109347090802210132005-02-25T11:31:00.000-05:002005-02-25T11:29:53.216-05:00LinesPick up lines I've actually used just to see if they worked*:"Hey, why don't you buy me a drink and get to know me better?""I just want to use you for your personality.""Wanna take me out? I'm broke.""Do you cook? Don't you think you should learn?""Are you always this much of a bitch?""But I'm really a nice guy...""Can I hump your leg?""Want another drink? I'm trying to take advantage of you."Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1108595065917514112005-02-16T18:00:00.000-05:002005-02-16T18:32:36.223-05:00The Silent MinorityWith all of the hating on Republicans lately, I thought I'd bring up a few things to piss people off. A few things the wonderful Dems haven't brought up or acknowledged lately:1. We had elections in January in Iraq. Did you hear them admit that they were wrong, saying it was impossible? Nope. Now you hear them saying we need a public exit strategy. That's good, we'll help the fundamentalists withJohnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1108415949925133072005-02-14T16:18:00.000-05:002005-02-14T16:33:46.250-05:00Happy Hallmark DayIn the spirit of this dark, overcast, dreary day that happens to be celebrated by the embittered and entwined alike, I've decide to post some jokes and stuff about love, marriage, and the battle of the sexes. Note that I have no originality today and that I just thought some of these might be funny.Enjoy.HOW TO TELL THE SEX OF A FLYA woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1106597454186407362005-01-24T15:01:00.000-05:002005-02-04T02:05:09.123-05:00ReflectionsLike many a blogger out there, I take hard and sometimes unforgiving looks at my life on a rather consistently masochistic platform. I don't really know why I do it, but with a few people in my life riding herd and seeing visions of an apex I have yet to achieve, it makes things harder.
Yet I am, without a doubt, my own harshest critic.
Lately, this has evolved into psychosomatic ailments Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1105422287192909132005-01-11T01:42:00.000-05:002005-01-11T00:56:56.003-05:00New Years: The Party That Never EndsFor the first time in years, I haven't had the New Year's party at my house.
It wasn't a big loss, I just moved it to a friend's house and we had it there. At least 20 of my regulars were on another coast, far away, or just went to see the ball drop in person. If you have an urge to do this, I would gently turn to you and say, "You're an idiot," and let that wisdom lay upon you for awhile.
So Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1104278246539126742004-12-28T18:50:00.000-05:002004-12-28T18:57:26.540-05:00Roadblock RemovedWell, after much hemming and hawing, my story is complete. I placed it after the last installment just to keep the linearity of the story complete. You can scroll down or just jump to it here.
With the holidays and new year approaching, I hope I'll have some time to write a little more with at least a good story or two along the way.
I want to make a specific point of thanking Catt for Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1103249943996149802004-12-16T21:19:00.000-05:002004-12-16T21:23:10.150-05:00Clowning AroundHere's me on Halloween. Yes, I was Krusty the Clown. Yes, the mask weighed a ton, and I barely wore it much. The fumes from that thing would be enough to kill a buffalo.
I will eventually return, and I appreciate those of you that have shot me emails of concern, and laughed at those of disdain. I'm in the middle of finals week, so at the moment, I'm too busy to do much beyond this.
Thanks Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1100246206784513072004-11-12T02:54:00.000-05:002004-11-12T02:56:46.783-05:00Too BusySorry I've been very negligent, but I've been busy with school as well as being pretty uninspired. Unfortunately, I'll be out of town (just north of Boston) for the weekend, so I doubt I'll be able to update until sometime afterwards. I appreciate those of you who stop by and leave comments, I will appease and end this little story as soon as I can.
Otherwise, good wishes for a great weekend.Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1099700700909028392004-11-08T18:00:00.000-05:002004-12-28T18:49:32.953-05:00The Name's Bond, Johnny5 Bond (Part VI + Epilogue)Well, considering how long I've let this go, I think I'll just wrap it all up here. Sorry about the delay everyone.
Part VIMy memory of that night in the hospital is hazy and vague at best, but I can piece together certain interesting parts. When I was pulled in on the board and taken off, for instance, they had to strip me down to my boxers, something that (unfortunately) the male nurse, SteveJohnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1099595681688015202004-11-04T13:39:00.000-05:002004-11-04T14:17:32.963-05:00The Name's Bond, Johnny5 Bond (Part V)Flashlights arrived in my face and I felt like I was at the bottom of a copper huddle. I couldn't really tell you what the landscape looked like, but I imagine it was pretty chaotic. It felt chaotic. GD was so tweaked out at this point, she was barely capable of proper communication. Maybe that was for the better at this point anyway.
"Can you get up, son?" one of the boys in blue asked.
"Not Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1099388710437000822004-11-02T13:30:00.000-05:002004-11-02T13:32:31.060-05:00The Name's Bond, Johnny5 Bond (Part IV)I don't really know what told me to do it.
GD claimed that she screamed out, but I never heard her. I never heard anything. My eyes were closed, and I was still getting over trying to catch my breath. I had no indication whatsoever, just a feeling, like something telling me it needed to be done. So I did it.
I jumped.
Not a skip, not a hop, not even a test of my vertical ability, but a full Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1098976422100319352004-10-28T11:15:00.000-04:002004-10-29T11:13:56.646-04:00The Name's Bond, Johnny5 Bond (Part III)Here's where things get a little weird.
I felt like I actually left my body. Having an "out of body experience" is always an eye rolling statement because it sounds like a farce, but I swore at the time and since then that it actually did happen. I just remember sort of watching the roof of the car in a decidely removed vantage point where I didn't really note what was happening, but I was Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1098875721370432972004-10-27T07:07:00.000-04:002004-10-27T22:14:20.116-04:00The Name's Bond, Johnny5 Bond (Part II)Girl Driving, or GD for short, was excited because she had her father's car that weekend, which happened to be an Audi. I also had a reputation that still lingered for being what people called "a driver." This affable label, for those that are reclusive hideaways, is applied to those that at one point drove fast and liked speed. Unfortunately, even though I had smartened up, the label still stuckJohnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1098795049308912422004-10-26T09:00:00.000-04:002004-10-27T07:17:47.476-04:00The Name's Bond, Johnny5 Bond (Part I)A few years ago, I had one of those nights: a two ex-girlfriend night. Two of the most "influential" (context is left to the reader) women in my life were on my path in the evening, one I had just recently separated with and one that I had a long time ago that had been my first real emotionally substantial relationship.
Although I had driven my mind to a point that I believed I was capable of Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1098225911431095942004-10-19T19:43:00.000-04:002004-10-19T19:44:10.873-04:00Bullets That Aren't Bad For YouA couple of things worth mentioning and checking out:
Have you seen the Trashman's on going story? You should.An old but developing story: telekinesis may be coming to a store near you. Two years ago, scientists already developed a method of motor cortex implants that allowed a a monkey can move a cursor with just its thoughts. Imagine the future possibilties: parapeligics that can have Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1098151083248769032004-10-18T22:06:00.000-04:002004-10-18T23:03:23.286-04:00Duet On The RadioI was sitting in the car the other night, thinking about my life, when this song comes on that I had forgotten about. The song is by Seether with Amy Lee from Evanescence, and is called "Broken". The lyrics are awesome, but the song is even better.
It's almost like an epiphany when a song somehow touches a part of you in an ineffable way. I'm not sure the lyrics hold up to what I feel on paper, Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1098015164077542722004-10-17T08:09:00.000-04:002004-10-17T08:13:27.950-04:00Know Thy NeighborWant to be one of them nosy types? I know you do. If you feel the need to find out who donated money to presidential canidates or parties, by all means, go to work.
It's funny to see the divisions just in my town and my old stomping grounds.
Note: I've stayed decidedly neutral about my politics. Can you do the same?Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1097744039199506572004-10-14T05:14:00.000-04:002004-10-14T05:14:55.496-04:0010,000 Hits And A New DesignI've officially had ten thousand hits! I'm thoroughly amazed at this.
In light of the amount of visits and the upcoming Hallow's Eve, I've done a major redesign, including some spooky (alright, maybe not) colors. I want to thank all of the people who visit, especially those of you that leave comments good and bad. It definitely spurs me to continue delivering whatever it is I deliver to the Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6654011.post-1097612637063935322004-10-12T19:00:00.000-04:002004-10-12T19:01:08.913-04:00Fall In New EnglandPicture it:
It's a brisk 50 degrees, the sun is setting in the western sky. The wind is blowing nicely enough to barely rustle your hair, and you are experiencing the duality of cool breeze and warm sun. The sky has a slight orange tint added to it's normal yellow and blue saturation. It's comfortable wearing a sweater, and comfortable to not wear one. The leaves drift down from trees in a Johnny5http://www.blogger.com/profile/14517630359903357625noreply@blogger.com0