Friday, February 25, 2005


Pick up lines I've actually used just to see if they worked*:

"Hey, why don't you buy me a drink and get to know me better?"

"I just want to use you for your personality."

"Wanna take me out? I'm broke."

"Do you cook? Don't you think you should learn?"

"Are you always this much of a bitch?"

"But I'm really a nice guy..."

"Can I hump your leg?"

"Want another drink? I'm trying to take advantage of you."

"You're purty."

"You smell good." (followed by sniffing like a dog in her ear)

"I like my women like I like my dogs: subservient, begging and hairy."

"Wow. That wasn't even remotely funny."

"I hate being wing man. What's your name?"

"You weren't kidding when you said you suck at life, huh?"

"All aboard!" (speaking to two girls)

"Do you flirt with all of the boys like this?"

"People generally think it's appropriate to chew with their mouth closed. You should try it."

"You really think you should have kids?"

"Do you always act like a lesbian or do you just need the attention?"

"Damn, with those boots, you almost look like a hooker..."

"I wonder if you're cute when I'm sober."

And perhaps the worst I've ever said:

"Don't be mad just because you're losing the war to gravity."

*None of them actually were successful. Do not try this at home.


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